The Queen Mother

There are quite a few people around the Azle area that know me as the former long-time pastor of Eagle Mountain Baptist Church. I am honored to have that designation. Not many pastors are afforded the blessing of serving the same congregation for seventeen years. A lot of really long-time Azle area residents know that before there was a Gerry Lewis at EMBC there was a Roland Earl. Now, there’s a legend. His thirty-one years as pastor make my seventeen seem like a brief sojourn. It was my honor to serve as his associate for four years when I was a seminary student. He was my mentor, my friend, and my father in the ministry. When his ministry was completed and he graduated into heaven in 1991, I was humbled to be called to the church as his successor.

While Roland cast a long shadow in the community, there was a less public partner who often stood in the shadows. Ruth loved being the pastor’s wife for two main reasons—she loved the Lord and she loved the pastor. Jesus and Roland were the only men for her. She was mom to their three daughters, Granny to their grandchildren, and a friend and encourager to everyone who needed either.

When I came back to EMBC as pastor, she graciously relinquished her role as First Lady and helped my wife to flourish in her own ministry and in her own giftedness. In one of our earliest conversations, she told me she had been the pastor’s wife for so long that she wasn’t sure what else her role was. I told her the she could be the pastor’s mom since mine lived so far away. There were times over the years that I went to her house for a “mom” talk when I was overwhelmed and needed to unload. Our family has included her on our Mother’s Day card list for the past 25 years. For the entirety of my pastorate at EMBC I considered her the Queen Mother. God gave me an immeasurable gift in allowing me to be her “son” and her pastor. My own mom has considered it a blessing to share me with Ruth.

A few days ago, less than two months after her 86^th birthday, her frail little body wore out. She completed her ministry and graduated into heaven. The Bible says, "Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints” (Psalm 116:15, NIV). We miss her, but I believe that on Thursday morning King Jesus got the first dance and Roland was standing close by getting ready for his turn. What a legacy! What a love! Their lives mattered. So do ours, even if we live in someone’s shadow.

Reach Out and Touch Someone

In 1979 a commercial debuted on the Tonight Show with Johnny Carson. The intent of the commercial was two-fold: (1) to get people to make more long distance calls and (2) to soften AT&T’s image as the big bad phone company monopoly. The commercial’s clever jingle asked people to reach out and touch someone … call up and just say hi … wherever you are, you’re never too far …

Some of you remember those commercials, as well as the rotary dial phones we were using back in the day. I remember calling home “collect” from a pay phone my first year of college. It was the only way available to reach out and touch the folks back at home. Ah, those were the days!

I got touched in a whole different way yesterday. If you look closely at the dust on the dented bumper of my Kia you can actually read a portion of the license plate number of the vehicle that hit me from behind and punched me across into the oncoming traffic, where my front bumper gently kissed the front bumper of another car. The touches were coming from everywhere!

People do a lot of things they shouldn’t do while driving (and I admit that I have often been guilty myself). Things like texting, talking on the phone, applying makeup (haven’t done that one), watching videos, reading, having lunch. With all those things going on, it is no wonder there are so many unintentional “touches” on the roads out there. And when those near-misses or non-misses occur you sometimes are tempted to reach out and touch someone “upside their head” as we used to say out in West Texas.

I realized yesterday after I got touched on both bumpers that I had a choice as to how I reached back. The fellow that hit me was really apologetic, and that helped my choice a lot. But I still could have given him a piece of my mind and lectured him on safe driving practices. That wouldn’t have helped his attitude or his driving. It also wouldn’t have made my car any less dented. It could have made me look like a jerk and that is not the person I want driving around in my car.

One of my favorite verses from the Bible says, “So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing.” (1 Thessalonians 5:11, NLT)

We may not have much control over how others reach out and touch us. We do have a choice about how we reach back. On this particular day, I chose to celebrate that we were both up and walking around. I had an opportunity to be an encouragement to him, to two police officers, and to several other people with whom I had conversations immediately following our little non-miss.

Do I always get it right? Are you kidding! But I want to, because I understand that my life matters to my Lord and He wants me to use it to encourage others. Your life matters, too.

Now, go call up someone and just say hi …

Making God Smile

My facial hair is growing back. It is not so much that I already got tired of the nekkid face, but that I just spent the past week on vacation. There are several items that are not allowed to participate with me on vacation: computer, wristwatch, razor. These items are especially unwelcome when the vacation is what has come to be known as The Annual Guy Trip.

The Annual Guy Trip is where I take my son and my son-in-law to some manly place for manly activities like hiking, fishing, rafting, eating lots of meat and other non-healthy foods (in fact, with the exception of one day, our only vegetables were green chiles and guacamole). This year’s trip was to a friend’s cabin in a remote canyon in northern New Mexico. It was rustic, beautiful and isolated. Our host told us to watch for a 600 pound black bear that had been seen frequently on that side of the canyon. We never saw him, but we did our hiking on the other side of the canyon, supposing that he knew where his boundaries were. We did see some fresh bear tracks near the private lake where we went trout fishing, but we never saw the bear. We did see deer, elk, squirrels, some young bald eagles hunting prairie dogs, and some amazingly beautiful scenery. And did I mention that we consumed a lot of red and green chile?

I have to confess that what I enjoyed most about the trip has not yet been mentioned. All that stuff was great, but what really inspired my prayers of thanksgiving to God happened after bed time. The old man couldn’t stay up as late as the boys, so I went to bed first each night. Lying in the dark and listening to their laughter and conversations, I was so appreciative of their relationship with each other. They are not just brothers-in-law. They are brothers and friends. And not only do they enjoy each other, they enjoy hanging out with me! I love my boys!

It makes me think of a couple of things that I think really make God smile. One is when His kids want to spend time with Him. Another is when His kids get along with (dare I say love) each other. He really loves His boys (and girls) and that’s why our lives really matter to Him.

Even when we skip our vegetables.

Midlife Crisis: The Nekkid Truth

My son texted, “Aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!!!” (I actually deleted several letters to save space).

My daughter posted on Facebook, “My father’s mid-life crisis is giving me a mental breakdown … don’t ask. I’m sure he will explain himself.” (I can only imagine what people could only imagine).

My wife said, “Who are you?”

What created this crisis among my loving and supportive family? I have a hairless face, with a nekkid upper lip, for the first time since 1981. (Yes, that is the West Texas spelling of a word that means to be uncovered). Now, there really is a point to my writing about this that has very little to do with facial hair. I just think all the reactions have been funny. I must say that I did not anticipate the level of discomfort it has created for my offspring. Maybe I should have forewarned them? And just so you know what a thoughtful husband I am, I did indeed give Mrs. Sweetie a few days advance warning.

My kids say I look like their Grandpa. My friends say I look like my son. I take both statements as compliments. I happen to think I am the peanut butter in the middle of a pretty good-looking genetic sandwich (at least the bread on both ends is pretty good-looking). But that is just my opinion.

Psychologically, I think at the 30 year mark of hairy-lippedness, and some challenging midlife questions of what the next few years will look like, I needed to shave down to the basics and see that I am still me. It is not exactly the same face I remember (19 years old and an expert on life), but it is familiar.

I saw a sign not long ago that said, “Be yourself … everyone else is taken.” I like it! My current appearance is not who I am. What is on the inside …the character the Lord is developing in me … the husband, son, father, friend, child of God … that’s who I am. The Bible says that the Lord knows how many hairs are on my head (Matthew 10:30). Neither the color nor the quantity causes a crisis for Him. He has given me the freedom to do with it what I will. He just wants me to honor Him in the way I conduct my life.

I’m probably growing most of it back soon, not because it’s who I am, but because I still like it (and so apparently does my family). It is not my hair, but my life that matters most to Him.

Your life matters, too.

Waiting to Exhale

The title of this post may sound familiar to you. There was a movie by the same name a few years ago (1995). I didn't see the movie and I don't know what it was about, but I remember the title. It popped into my head as I was thinking about what I was going to write for this edition of Life Matters.


If that seems to you like a strange thing to suddenly pop into one's head, I should let you know a couple of things. First of all, one should never be surprised at anything that pops into this increasingly gray head. Secondly, it didn't pop without a trigger. I have for the past few months been reading through a Psalm per day in my morning devotional time. This morning was Psalm 150 and it ends with these words:

Let everything that breathes praise the Lord. Hallelujah! (Psalm 150:6, NLT)

Many mornings as I spend time contemplating the Word of the Lord, I enjoy posting to Facebook and Twitter a portion of scripture along with a few words of my own reflection. This morning I posted the whole Psalm along with these words, "I am breathing, so I need to be praising." I thought it was pretty good, though I might be alone in that assessment. I had a picture in mind of inhaling the presence of the Lord and exhaling His praise.


Then I left the house. Work interrupted my day off. Thoughts began creeping in of some of the difficult situations that are a part of my current reality. Even the "to do" list that I intended for my day off began to seem like just a series of tedious events. And to top it all off, I needed to find a place and time to compose this post.


As I sat in a local business that offers free internet (technology is so awesome!), I started this contemplation ... my intent on leaving the house was to be exhaling His praise throughout the day. Oops! Apparently, I have been waiting to exhale. Waiting until I knocked out the "to do" list. Waiting until I wasn't feeling overwhelmed ... or interrupted ... or distracted ... or ...


So, while the folks around me may not know it, God is getting a pretty good dose of my praise right here in this corner booth. There is so much about the life He has given me that should inspire that praise. I feel like I have taken one of those "deep cleansing breaths" that I have heard about. Now that I'm breathing again, a car inspection and a lawnmower await. And I am so glad He has provided both.


Breathe deep. Your life matters.

A Royal Pain

I admit it. I don't get it. (That's as poetic as this post is going to get). What don't I get, you ask? A lot of things, but right now what I don't get is the drooling gaga-ness over The Royal Wedding. Please don't try to help me understand the historical significance or the romance of it. I readily admit that I don't get it because I don't want to get it. This wedding has absolutely zero effect on my life. Now, when I married off my own princess four months ago ... that wedding matters to me (and I am happy for you to see the 400 pictures I have posted on Facebook). In two months I will celebrate twenty-seven years of marriage to the queen of my life ... that wedding matters to me.


I really don't want to take up all my space here writing about weddings. I get weddings. I guess what I don't get is Royalty. I cannot imagine what it would be like. Maybe we all dream of what it would be like. Maybe they all dream of what it would be like to be a regular person. I do know that there are times when I have been a Royal Pain. I suspect you've had them, too. You know what I mean--those times when we have acted like it was all about us. We have talked down to people or, at the very least, we have made them feel as if they really did not matter. They were there only to help us get what we wanted.


Just this morning, I was at a cash register paying for a service that had just been done to my car. The young man operating the register asked how my day was going. "Great," I replied, and then after a pause, "how about yours?" His answer really got me thinking.


"Well, I could tell you, but the truth is that you really don't care about the answer, so I'll just save the time and keep it to myself."


Wow! I wonder how many Royal Pains he has dealt with that made him presuppose that I really didn't care. I'd love to tell you that we sat down for a cup of coffee and a chat and that he was able to unload his burden. The line of customers behind me prevented it. But, I really did care about his answer and his day. I hope my demeanor at least didn't burden him any more. I'm not sure what I could have done differently, but I do want to be intentional about how I come across, especially to those who are making my life better by serving me.


It makes me think of these words from the Bible: "Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought ... Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves." (Romans 12:3, 10,NIV)


It also makes me think of the ultimate royalty, the King of Kings, who said of himself that he "did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many." (Matthew 20:28 & Mark 10:45)


We never look more like our King than when we voluntarily serve and honor those who least expect it.


And by the way, the King says that your life really matters to Him.